No Gray areas either Black or White
Writing my own narrative as; I continue re-parenting myself setting healthy boundaries, and a new beginning one filled with Joy, and Happiness. Ironically, today is my late mom’s birthday. She expired twenty-nine years ago. I was only thirty-six-year-old when I was forced into being an orphan. The odd thing about all this, is my mom gave birth to me at age thirty-six, and she died when, I made thirty-six years old the youngest of the four children. So, today on this here Happy Thanksgiving; I decided to watch #netflix “Our Souls at Night” https://youtu.be/lci71HjGvaM featuring two of my favorite actors Jane Fonda, and Robert Redford. I think this movie is at the top of my list, for those of us fearing the aging process. The tenacity of these two people to write their own narrative is outstanding. I think hardships does sharpen our determination in some strange way strengthen our will and/or sense of purpose in ways that can only be admired by the masses. Family gave resistance to the connection, but that did not deter them from cultivating creative ways of staying the course of a blossoming friendship. Wearing the mask to deter the fear and anxiety of vulnerability that comes with facing true Love. Therefore, it elicits toxic co-dependency in relationships. I can recall being at the table feasting on holiday foods with friends, and family members know that there was physical, and verbal abuse among the couples, but the world wind of being a part of something big, and I was really good at dressing the part on the special occasion took precedence over everything else all for the sake of keeping with lazy traditions and the Sonny and Cher 1967 song “…The Beat goes on…” The Platters 1962 song “Oh yes I’m the great pretender”. I was wearing a mask, and this was the draw for the WTF? People, places, and situations; I found myself in, for years the mask just kept getting bigger, tighter, and more fixated.